Hacked Life

During his regular Wednesday afternoon 10-minute guided energy-cleansing meditation session, the following message flashed on the inside of Brydon’s eyelids:


Thanks to a programming flaw in the neural chip implanted in your brain, we have hacked it and essentially your life and extracted the databases cataloging the entirety of your being.

How did this happen?

Our team of experts has found a backdoor vulnerability within your brain chip that we were able to exploit, allowing us to access your credentials and extract your entire database, the information of which has been moved to an offshore server.

What does this mean?

We will systematically go through the process of destroying your reputation. Secrets? You no longer have those. Your life has just become an open book. The portion of the database containing all the damaging skeletons hiding in your closet will be leaked or sold to the highest bidder to use as they see fit.

Next, if there are any salacious or negative thoughts or dreams about family, friends, or coworkers, they will be forwarded to all parties involved. Committed a crime that you thought you got away with? The local and perhaps even federal authorities will be notified.

And in case you’re not worried about this hack because you lead a good, honest and innocent life, you will want to take note of the fact that we will invent scandals that will turn your life into a living hell. You will be shunned by family and friends, fired from your place of employment, run out of town, face the possibility of imprisonment, and be forced to notify your neighbors that you are a registered sex offender.

How do you stop this?

We are willing to refrain from destroying your reputation for a small one-time cryptocurrency fee:

  • The amount: $30,000
  • The Address Part 1: Xliehhviwwmw1313qsgomrkfmvhperijmvwxlsywisrxlipijx
  • The Address Part 2: Mjcsyaiviefpixshigmtlivxlmwevir’xcsyxligpizivpmxxpigpsknywxxcti
  • The Address Part 3: “sverkitiipneddferh”mrxligsqqirxxspixqiorsacsygvegoihmx

In order to remit payment, you will need to manually copy + paste Part1, Part2, and Part3 in one string with no space between the parts that begin with “X” and end with “x” – This is the actual address where the money must be sent.

Once you have met our demands, we will automatically be informed of your payment. Please note: It is imperative that you issue payment within 72 hours of receipt of this message, or else the database leak WILL BEGIN IMMEDIATELY!

How do you purchase cryptocurrency?

You can easily buy cryptocoins via several websites or even offline from a Crytocoin-ATM.

What if you decide not to pay?

If you unwisely choose not to pay, we will begin the attack at the indicated date and uphold it until your payment is received. Please be advised that there are no countermeasures to this. You will only end up wasting more money trying to find a solution. We will completely destroy your reputation with people and oraginzations in your past, present, and even your future.

This is not a hoax! Do attempt to reason or negotiate with us! Payment in full is your only recourse! Upon receipt of your payment, we will discontinue our malicious act and you will never hear from us again!

Please note that crytocoin is anonymous and no one will find out that you have complied.

So, what are you waiting for? The clock is ticking!

Not. The. End.

2 responses to “Hacked Life

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