Popular belief has it that the universe is comprised of atoms. In reality, the universe is actually made up of…
“Do you hate animals,” Florence asked her boyfriend. “I mean, no judgments if you do, it’s just you know how much I love them, right?”
“Yeah, I know you do,” answered Frank. “And no, I don’t have anything against animals.”
“Then why don’t you want a pet? They’re great companions, filled with love and affection, and studies show that pet owners tend to live longer, healthier lives.”
“I can’t tell you.”
“Why not?”
“You’ll laugh.”
Florence made the sign of the cross on her left breast with her index finger. “Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye. I promise, I won’t.”
Frank left out a long, slow breath and said, “I grew up poor…”
“There’s no shame in that.”
“And my childhood home was a one-bedroom apartment that was so small that you had to open a window if you wanted to change your mind…”
“I’ve lived in a few of those,” Florence nodded in understanding.
“And I wanted to have a pet so badly, but there just wasn’t enough room, and we couldn’t have afforded to feed one anyway…”
Florence gave a soft grunt and nodded again.
“But like I said,” Frank continued. “I wanted a pet so badly…so I made my own pets out of dust bunnies who lived under my bed. I built them a warren and everything, and we used to go on imaginary adventures…”
“Awww, that’s so adorable,” invisible heart emojis beamed from Florence’s eyes.
“But my mother would always ruin it each time she came through for a quick tidy-up with the Dustbuster. All those bunny deaths…all those bunny deaths…”
Florence wrapped her arms around her boyfriend and held him as he wept softly into her shoulder. If they remained together, she knew they would live in a pet-free home.
©2019 Rhyan Scorpio-Rhys
MADD FICTIONAL 
In Canada, there is a widely adored commercial that aired in the early 80’s featuring “house hippos” that lived beneath our beds and couches and fed upon our dust bunnies. Entire generations of Canadians fell in love with those house hippos and we fall to pieces over stories of dust bunnies in general. Thank you for this one.
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There was no way that I wouldn’t go searching for house hippos after learning about them and praise be to the YouTube gods for providing me with visuals:
Thank you for bringing them to my attention, Jennifer!
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Dust bunnies and House Hippos. Could life get any better.
Rhyan, the image you’ve used is so eerie. I think they’re stuffed rabbits.
“And my childhood home was a one-bedroom apartment that was so small that you had to open a window if you wanted to change your mind…”
This line is brilliant.
Certain childhood scares turn into adulthood nightmares and never actually leave you.
‘If they remained together, she knew they would live in a pet-free home.’
That IF says a lot about the future.
Great writing! 🙂
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There’s a popular belief that love conquers all, and I wish that were true, but the reality is that love conquers some and the ratio is higher on the unconquerable side.
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