Available: One writer. Slightly used.

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Available: One writer. Slightly used. Warranty still good. Greying but no significant exterior dings, scratches, dents, or cracks. Mercurial movie lover and unabashed nerd (genuine, not a faux Lisa Loeb glasses-wearing cool-because-it’s-trendy poseur) with science fiction and creature feature tendencies. Proficient in DaVinci Resolve, Final Draft, and Affinity Photo. Comes equipped with a subversive and wicked sense of humor. Able to subsist solely on NutriBullet smoothies, grilled chicken, rice and beans, and ginger tea. Will perform stupid human tricks for bacon double cheeseburgers and Guinness. Optional accessories include three rotating personalities (one of whom is rumored–but not yet confirmed–to have defeated a Dalek in hand-to-hand combat and thereby is in line to become the Fourteenth Doctor). If writers are your thing, you’ll like the cut of this one’s jib.

44 responses to “Available: One writer. Slightly used.

  1. I’m glad you’re eating healthier now. I’m not sure about the tricks though. I think Vintage Writer would’ve been a more suitable title. Now don’t smirk and roll your eyes. A few sarcastic punches will do. Good one. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Scary thought – a hundred years ago, when they were relevant, Lisa and Dweezil and were on my artist relations list. There’s an old saying about scholarship and depth trumping fads and trendspeak. I say that because Herbie Hancock was on that list as well. Yin and yang. I’m meeting a friend for lunch. Bacon cheeseburgers and Negra Modelo. Guinness has to be later in the day.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Now you’ve got me thinking “Must…have…cheeseburgers…” in a James T. Kirk voice… 😀 Seriously, anything with cheeseburgers, count me in (especially if they have lots of jalapenos on ’em). Your gilded wit is effortless, good sir. This really brightened up my night. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Guinness, bacon double cheeseburgers, and pizza are my weaknesses and they’re on the forbidden food list and are going to put me in an early grave because although I do not indulge as much anymore, I cannot stay away completely. As a carnivore, there are only so many damned salads you can eat before you go mental. Cheers for the kind words!

      Liked by 1 person

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